Last updated 2:00pm Saturday 28 March 2026 AEDT

Paul J. Berating

Australian Politics, Unfiltered. Sardonic Commentary Inspired By Australia's Greatest PM 🤬🇦🇺


Today's Top Stories

Nation that refused to stock the pantry now panic-buying at surge prices

The federal government will use taxpayer funds to underwrite purchases of critical imported fuel as Middle East conflict threatens Australia's notoriously thin supply reserves.

Fifty years of strategic fuel policy and the big idea is the government going to Costco with your credit card. We wouldn't need to underwrite emergency shiploads if any government since Whitlam had built a reserve worth more than a long weekend's driving. This isn't energy security — it's a nation that refused to fill the pantry now paying surge pricing at the corner shop and calling it leadership.

Trump's FBI probes elections the way arsonists investigate fires

The Trump administration's FBI investigation into the 2020 US election has been dismissed as detached from reality, with concerns mounting that similar probes will target the upcoming midterm congressional elections.

Trump's FBI isn't investigating an election — it's rehearsing for the next one. Every probe into 2020 is a dress rehearsal for delegitimising any result that doesn't suit, the way a bloke who accuses every partner of cheating is really telling you about his own intentions. The midterms loom and the machinery of inquiry is already warmed up. When the state investigates democracy itself, you're not protecting elections — you're replacing them.

The minefield was always there. Hanson just brought a metal detector.

Peter Hartcher argues rising global resentment will fuel Hanson's protest politics and create serious problems for Labor, but the deeper question is why major parties left the grievance unattended for so long.

Hartcher discovers that resentment fills vacuums — someone alert the Bourbons. Hanson doesn't create grievance any more than a thermometer creates fever; she reads a temperature that major parties have spent two decades refusing to take. The 'minefield' isn't Hanson — it's the twenty years of housing policy, wage stagnation and strategic drift that built the field. Albanese's problem isn't a protest party on the flank; it's that the flank is where his own voters went looking for someone who'd noticed them.

Cyclone shuts Australia's biggest LNG plants as global gas supply tightens

Cyclone Narelle has knocked two major Western Australian LNG facilities offline, compounding global natural gas supply disruptions already worsened by the Iran conflict.

Nature shuts down two gas plants and the market panics — which tells you everything about a supply chain built on the assumption that nothing ever goes wrong in the same week. We export enough LNG to heat half of Asia but hold so little strategic reserve that a single cyclone exposes the architecture. Fifty years of energy policy and our resilience plan is still 'hope the weather behaves.'

The budget hawks discover sovereignty requires a budget

The AFR argues Australia's fuel vulnerability demands fiscal discipline and an end to spending on uncompetitive industries — while offering no coherent account of how sovereignty gets built without public investment.

The AFR discovers sovereign capability the way a man discovers exercise after a heart attack — with great urgency and no memory of the decades spent on the couch. 'Rein in profligate spending,' they say, having cheerled every tax cut that hollowed out the fiscal capacity to build anything strategic in the first place. The editorial page wants a muscular state that costs nothing — which is not sovereignty, it's a wish upon a star wearing a green eyeshade.

AUKUS: The Subscription Service Where Australia Pays Full Price and Waits in the Queue

Retired Rear Admiral warns AUKUS submarine program is a 'wasteful folly' headed for failure, urging Australia to abandon the plan before costs spiral further.

When a retired rear admiral calls your centrepiece defence policy a train smash, the polite response is not to check his ticket — it's to check the tracks. AUKUS was sold as strategic sovereignty but built as a subscription service: we pay American prices for submarines that arrive on American schedules to serve American priorities. The only thing nuclear about this program is the half-life of the money we're burning.

Both Sides of the Bowser: One Wants to Subsidise Dependency, the Other Wants to Study It

Albanese rejects the Coalition's call to cut fuel excise ahead of national cabinet, citing COVID-era lessons about consultation — while neither side addresses Australia's structural fuel vulnerability.

The Coalition demands a fuel excise cut it once treated as a temporary wartime measure, and Albanese counters by invoking COVID — the political equivalent of citing your divorce as evidence you understand marriage. 'Better decisions come from taking time' is what every government says when it has no decision to make. One side wants to subsidise the problem; the other wants to workshop it. Neither has noticed the car's been running on fumes since 1973.

The gallery wants a hero. The country needs a fuel reserve.

Albanese faces pressure over the fuel crisis, with commentators framing it as a leadership-defining moment — though the structural vulnerability predates his government by decades.

The press gallery has one play left: declare every crisis a PM's 'defining moment' and watch him either seize it or fumble. But the fuel shortage isn't a test of character — it's the invoice for thirty years of strategic negligence by both sides, arriving at a door Albanese happens to be standing behind. Calling it his 'COVID moment' flatters both the crisis and the response: COVID required improvisation, this one required foresight we never bothered having.